Earlier this season, Elizabeth saw a Christmas movie. In it, there was a man who owned a toy store, and would dress up like Santa and take toys to children. The star of the movie, a bear who's smile was on upside down, thought that the old man really was Santa, especially when "Santa" knew just what the bear wanted, a real home for Christmas.
At the end of the movie, Elizabeth exclaimed, "Wow Mommy! Santa is like God! He can see everything we do and knows what we want!" Yikes!!
Last week, Micah was sitting by the nativity, and asked me, "How'd he do it?" "How did who do what?" I replied back. "How'd God get to be a baby?" Wow!
I brings me so much joy to see my children think, question and learn more about their Creator and the birth of his Son. I love telling them the Christmas story over, and over. We delight in imagining how the shepherds might have felt, what angels really look like, if baby Jesus was bald, and then talking about WHY Jesus came.
With all the questions that are being asked, Curtis and I have chosen to not do the whole Santa thing with our kids. There are so many distractions, so many questions, that we don't see any reason to add Santa to the mix. Our kids are also really young, and the line between reality and fantasy is easily blurred. Elizabeth asked me , "Can we go to the beach to see mermaids?" If I chose to tell Elizabeth that there were no mermaids, than why would I tell her that a man in a red suit comes into her house?
I've found that the "faith of a child" is something that can easily be taken advantage of. We choose to fill their heads, and place their faith and belief, in reality, rather than fiction. We want them to know forwards and backwards, inside and outside, the story of salvation, rather than the story of Santa.
Do we think that a family who chooses to "do Santa" are going to permanently screw up their children? Of course not! It's their decision to do what they want with their kids, just like it's our decision to do (or in this case, not do) what we want with Santa.
I know several families who are doing the whole Santa thing, and doing a fantastic job of balancing it, and not making Christmas all about Santa. And I know that's something we could do too..... place the focus on Christ, yet have the fun of Santa. In the future, that's really what I would like to do. Growing up, we always left Peanut M&M's and Diet Mt. Dew out for Santa, knowing full well that Santa, was really my Dad. It was fun! "Santa" would leave us notes, Rudolph would take bites from the carrot. Fun! But I don't feel comfortable doing that with my kids, at least not yet. I need them to know, without a shadow of a doubt the TRUE Christmas story. They we can play the whole Santa thing.
One less distraction can't be a bad thing.
And while we're on the topic, does anyone else get super annoyed when they see this:
One, try explaining to a four year old that baby Jesus didn't really have a "shinny gold circle" on his head. Two, I don't like how the line between fantasy and reality is being blurred. I want my children to know what's real, to believe in what's real, even if it's not tangible. This whole Santa and baby Jesus thing messes that up too much for me!
So there are my thoughts! I look forward to hearing your thoughts on the Santa Subject as well.
14 comments:
I am virulently and adamantly anti-Santa (big surprise, I know). He is ascribed God-like attributes (omnipotence, omnipresence, and omniscience) and is founded on a works-based scenario.
However, I also personally have a problem with the 'baby Jesus' part of the photo because of my understanding that the Second Commandment forbids images of God.
Westminster Larger Catechism:
'Q. 109. What are the sins forbidden in the second commandment?
A. The sins forbidden in the second commandment are...the making any representation of God, of all or of any of the three persons, either inwardly in our mind, or outwardly in any kind of image or likeness of any creature whatsoever...'
I know that's not a very popular view to-day...
Well, you know my view on Santa. We "do" Santa, very minimally. We don't visit Santa in the mall, we don't write him letters, and we do NOT tell Alexis that she needs to be good so Santa will bring her presents because he's "always watching". That does not do well with me! In fact, we hardly talk about Santa. But she knows she'll get a present from him and we'll leave him cookies. Again, it's fun, but he is very minimalized in our celebration of Christmas. I'm sure by next year it'll be clear that he is pretend, I think she might already have a hunch now which would be great. She laughs at people when they ask if she went to see santa and if she left him a list.
And yeah, I have big problems with that picture and with baby Jesus having a halo.
And I forgot to add (my phone rang) that, thankfully, there has been no confusion as to the reason for Christmas or thoughts that Santa is God-like. Alexis grasps the reality of Jesus. She clearly understands what is going on, but if she was confused I would pull the plug also.
Matt: Good point! Thanks for sharing!
Christi: I'm really glad you commented. I like the way you and Michael have balanced the whole Santa thing. It's very obvious that the priority is not keeping up the Santa story, or telling Alexis about him, but rather teaching her about the real reason behind Christmas. I like the way you guys have balanced the real thing, but still mixing in a little of the fun!
Ok I kind of have a different view on things. And I know that mine is still very young, but me and Will already have started teaching Brayden about God, Jesus and why we really are here. We pray every night and talk about Jesus all the time. I think it is super super important not to lose what Christmas is really all about, and it is only about one person. But we plan to do the Santa thing, Will is taking Brayden tonight to do pictures with santa. I think that the parents that just let children think that this time of year is for getting presents and not about worshiping our lord are very sad, because we would not be here without him, but my faith is strong enough to know that I will be able to teach my children that Jesus is the reason we celebrate at this season, and still let them beleive in Santa, I feel there is nothing wrong in having those child like qualities. I grew up with santa in the house and I think my parents did a great job letting us know what is important. This is just my opinion, like you said everyone is entitled to their own opinion, and are going to raise their children the way they see fit.
Steph, thanks so much for sharing your thoughts! I was really wanting to get a discussion going, where we could all share our thoughts! It sounds like you and Will are doing an amazing job with Brayden, already. I admire how you guys are doing things.
And ditto what you said about the kids who think all this season is about it presents. So sad!!
Just to clarify a point I was attempting to make, I don't think there is anything wrong with letting your children believe in Santa. (Not that it really matters what I think :-)) I just know my children, and know that there would be too much confusion. I love the idea of setting out cookies, or some other fun treat, on Christmas Eve! But it's like Christi said in her comment, if the line of Santa and God was ever blurred (as it has been for Elizabeth this year) we pull the plug, which is what we did.
I hope you guys really enjoy Brayden's first Christmas!! Looking forward to seeing picture of him with Santa.
The question I asked myself a few years ago was this: Is celebrating the Incarnation of our Saviour sufficient? Or do I need to include Santa, trees, and presents in order to 'round out the holiday' and make this time of year enjoyable? (This question also pertains--with a few adjustments--to Easter.)
I also like to imagine (which is difficult due to the Second Commandment discussion above) what it would be like if I were able to actually celebrate Christ's birthday with Him on earth. Would I share His day with Santa--if he existed? Or would He get 100% of my attention?
I think of santa as just "fun". My children know the meaning of CHRISTmas. I thank you for your friendly forum of thoughts. We will do Santa as long as we can get away with it. BTW, until your comment, I thought of tha pic of santa and baby Jesus as a way of celebrating both. Thanks for keeping me on my toes!
Ok - I'll chime in. I was raised with Santa. But anyone who knows my parents - or knew my grandparents - know that we certainly know exactly what Christmas is about. Having said that, my children have always had Santa. Even still - they humor me - and leave cookies for santa. Of course, I've made it clear that when they stop "believing" than he'll stop coming.
I think the best lesson to teach about santa is that he finds joy in GIVING gifts to the children ... not receiving. And like-wise, my kids have been more focused on what they're getting each other or their parents, friends, teachers, etc than what they're getting. And the reason we give gifts ... for me and mine is to help us remember the greatest gift of all.
Now ... those of you who don't know me or my family - a few things to keep in mind. 1) I was born and raised Catholic as the youngest of 5 kids. Advent was a daily reminder for us with the nativity scene front and center. 2)I remember we always had things like socks and favorite foods in our stockings ... like asparagus, peanut butter or for me it was grape jelly. Sure there were fun things too - but the true "filling" of the stocking was stuff that no one really wanted to open from under the tree but we needed.
And finally - I never had a problem with the picture you had with Santa worshipping baby Jesus. I see it more simply without getting into details (like no Santa without Christ). I see the reality that all worship before christ ... even or especially Santa.
Okay - done.
Merry Christmas to all!!! And since I just watched Christmas Carol ... God Bless us, everyone.
The way we do it is in keeping with our kids classical Christian education-and mine and Adam's obsession with history:) . As a family we learned about the time in history when "St. Nicholas" was showing God's love in a concrete way by giving to those who were in need. The girls know that Daddy is pretending to be St. Nicholas (and they totally dismiss a man in a red suit) and know he'll leave them a few presents the next morning. Our main focus of the season-as far as the physical manifestation goes, our month is spent on focusing on Christ's birth- is on the showing God's love by giving to others. Next year the girls will be old enough to help with the Salvation Army and serving at the local shelters. Up until this point we've just donated at any red kettle we could, donated coats, blankets, toys, etc. Done Angel tree type of giving, food shopping for area food banks, etc. all the while talking about why we are showing love (so the world will know we are Christ's disciples). It GREATLY diminishes their focus of getting stuff and you should see their faces as we find ways to give and pray , and seeing them develop a servant's spirit keeps me praising God!
I have a funny story really...the other day GM and I were making chocolate covered pretzels and I was asking her about why we celebrate Christmas. Apparently I haven't talked about it enough because she looked up at me with her big blue eyes and said "Cause Santa come here, too, mommy." Errrr, not quite. haha, so we talked about what it really means. Anyway, I can see for a child how if you aren't deliberately telling them what Christmas is about, how they could get confused especially being out and about at Christmas time with all the focus of Santa.
Great topic Kiersten. We struggled with this issue this year because we don't do Santa (we treat him like Scooby Doo - another fun story that isn't real). However, we did Christmas morning with my parents. My folks did Santa when I was growing up (and I'm not scarred for life, and even Reformed now) and apparently assumed we were doing it. That made for some confusion that I hope we corrected with Stephen.
Question for anyone out there: how have you handled this so that 1) You keep Santa out and 2) you keep relatively decent relationships with your relations?
Another thought: focusing on giving is great. Part of what I want to do there is to take Stephen and go through his old toys, help him see which ones are good but not played with, and give them away.
Great post. We have been having this conversation, too--Isaac started walking around saying, "Ho, Ho, Ho SANTA" and we nipped that in the bud by pointing at santa pics and saying, "Not reeeeeeaaaaaaal."
=)
A good children's book that touches on this very topic: Santa, Are You For Real?
You can borrow it if you want. It tells the story of the real Saint Nicholas and how he wanted his life to count for Christ. He never would have wanted for himself to become the center of Christmas.
--Hannah A. (I'm at Marian's computer and it was easier to just post under Anonymous.)
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